Happy New Year!
I’m still scrubbing champagne spills off the floor from our NYE/housewarming party in our new house(!!!) so the new-ness of 2020 is still fresh on my mind. And just like everyone else, I’m thinking about what I want to do, what I want to change and what I want to make happen this year. So sorry, it’s another resolutions post because I know you are all just dying to know!
But, wait! I have to be a bit different so before I make resolutions for this year (which is going to be an absolute whopper), I wanted to check in with the resolutions I made last year and see how I did.
Last year: Don’t yuck other people’s yums.
This phrase was coined by Twitter queen Chrissy Teigen and I am still 100% am behind it. Not because I actually learned it at a wine tasting, but because I think it’s so true. Just because someone may like something that I don’t or they may have a different opinion than I do, that doesn’t make them wrong or means I need to HATE THEM IMMEDIATELY. They have the right to feel that way, just as I do (and we all know I love to make my opinions known…mostly about Tom Brady, Anna Kendrick the bobbleheaded b*tch, Jennifer Lawrence…)
How did I do?
Zadah’s Chrissy Teigen face…and how I felt about Thomas Rhett in July 2019.
Well…I didn’t exactly master this…(cough FLASHBACK TO #THOMASRHETTCHED2019 cough). So this year, I want to be more mature and quieter about how I feel while also being more respectful about what other’s are feeling and saying. For example, I for some reason got this really awful case of celebrity hatred towards Thomas Rhett after attending his concert this summer and was 2 seconds away from making a hate-fueled Instagram account trolling him and his family. People responded to my Instagram stories about it asking why and I basically blocked anyone who said they liked him. Again, this was THIS summer when I was 27 years old. So, clearly there is room for growth here. I need to sit down and shut up because LIFE CHANGES.
Speaking of wine, I’m attempting Dry January. I know, you’re probably like “not drinking for a month is going to be hard?” But for me, it will be a bit tricky. No, I’m not an alcoholic (nor am I making light of that AT ALL), but I’m very social and most of the events I attend or places I go include drinks of some sort. Happy hours, theater shows, dinners, events…there are always drinks being poured. It’s fun, but drinking slows me down and blocks me from achieving what I want to, like going to the gym or on a run the morning after. I just feel lighter, clearer and more balanced when I don’t drink so I think it’s a solid way to kick off the year!
Last year: Be kind … to myself.
I harshly critique myself and have a hard time giving myself credit for the work I do or the things I accomplish. I constantly struggle with liking how I look. In 2019, I was hoping to accept myself a little more.
How did I do?
This was “the moment” I mentioned. I have the most wonderful wedding planner, Alyssa!
I don’t think I’ll ever come to 100% acceptance of my body and liking myself, but I can say I made some progress this year. I got engaged this summer (!!!!!) and had a ton of anxiety about shopping for a wedding dress. I know I gained some weight from too many Coors Lights and snacks so I knew I was going to focus on my hips and bra bulge. But honestly, something amazing happened. I found that I didn’t look as awful as I thought I would. I was able to feel beautiful and confident, rather than depressed and discouraged. I had a really beautiful moment with my mom, Paige, my matron of honor Ally, and my friends Harmony and Alyssa after trying on a dress I thought I would always pick because it covered my arms. Four years ago, I was 99 pounds and struggling with eating. I was so critical of my body and hated the skin I was in. I wish I could time travel and tell that little skeleton that you are just as beautiful at 125 pounds as you are at 99 pounds and that you will one day finally feel OK in your body. It was really powerful and I’m glad I got to share that moment as I planned my wedding with people I really care about and I happily chomped down 3 slices of pizza later at game night. And it turns out, I picked a dress I never thought I would that really puts it all out there, so I need to be confident wearing it down the aisle.
On that note, while I DID book a trainer to get ready for the wedding, I’m making these promises to myself:
I will not become obsessive about only eating healthy foods and will feed and fuel my body. Food will not become my main focus.
I won’t kick myself for not making it to the gym every day.
I will use this time to first and foremost build confidence and inner strength, not just muscle.
Last year: Return my library books -- and read more.
I am notorious for not returning my library books. (I say notorious because I think the library may view me as a criminal. Don’t worry, I pay my fines and cover the costs of the books.) I always find myself so busy that I forget to return my books after I finish them…cue the meta idea that I need to slow down in all areas of my life.
This year: I currently have two library books that are about 2 weeks overdue sitting in my car right now. But, this is only the second time I let that happen this year. So, some progress was made. Also, ironically, I joined the Library’s fundraising committee and am eyeing a Board position so I’m actually giving more back to the Library.
Accurate photo of Jonny and me 100% of the time because I’m too tired to walk.
Either way, I still need to take time to slow down this year. The past 6 months have been an absolute whirlwind (getting engaged, getting a promotion, buying a house, beginning to plan a wedding) and have set up 2020 to be even bigger and better, but I need to take time to slow down. My family jokes that I am constantly sick, and I really am because I never take time to truly rest. I even went to the doctor and paid like $750 in labwork just for him to tell me that there’s nothing wrong with me (THANKFULLY), I just need to slow down. I’m running around to this event or this commitment, and a lot of the time my relationship with Jonny suffers because I’m either busy or I’m exhausted when we’re together and fall asleep at 8 pm. So, this year, I am carving out time to be intentional in my relationship and focus on growing together and what we need, and I’m taking time to relax and do things that slow me down and help me feel refreshed. Whether it’s time at the gym, reading in the tub, or watching “Casino Night” (the BEST Office episode), I’m going to be intentional about doing those things. And also going to take more vitamins. And drink more water. And get more sleep.
So, with that being said…Girl, Same wishes you a wonderful, healthy New Year full of allllll of the things that make you happy!
Love you most,
Hope